Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Fred is a Tool

As my fruit snacks clearly illustrate, Fred was by far the lamest character on Scooby Doo. Honestly, he had about as much personality as plank of wood (haha... remember "Plank" from Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy?... that's not what I was referring to), and he seemed like the 1970's version of a "bro" (orange ascot and white sweater: Fred :: polo with popped collar and aviator sunglasses : bro). I think that Fred's only real purpose was to babysit his idiot co-workers (and velma) and to drive the Mystery Machine. If you think about it, he was the only one who was really fit to drive; Scooby was a dog, Shaggy was stoned, Velma was practically blind and Daphne was slightly more intelligent than the common house fly. Basically, Fred was being used by everyone else in the gang, and that is a major act of toolery on his part.
Then again, Scooby Doo probably isn't the best cartoon to analyze. It was a poorly-animated and excruciatingly formulaic kids' show from the '70's about a pothead, a ditzy redhead, a nerd, Fred, and a great dane who drove around in their psychadelic van and solved mysteries... yeah.

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