Monday, November 30, 2009

Rap Video

I was messing around with Windows Movie Maker last night, and I decided to make a video. Obviously, my rap skills leave something to be desired... but that's why I'm in college.

p.s. If you went to a Montessori school, you might recognize a couple of the images.
Song of the moment: "White Rabbit"-Jefferson Airplane

This song has been stuck in my head all day. Unless you've been living under a rock for your whole life, you'll probably realize that it's all Alice in Wonderland references.

Thing that I'm currently anticipating: Finals. I'm a little bit nervous, but it'll be kind of cool to go through my first college finals week.

Doodle/image of the day:

I'm on my laptop right now and I don't have any pictures on my hard drive. Also, what's better than the Wu-Tang symbol? Rza, Gza, Raekwon the Chef, Ghostface Killah, U-God, Old Dirty Bastard, Method Man, Masta Killa and Inspektah Deck... you know the deal... straight from the slums of Shaolin... Wu-Tang Killah Bees!

Random Thoughts: I'm in my Religions of the World classroom right now and it is hot as hell! It must be at leat ninety degrees in here.

Today, we were talking about poop at lunch (don't ask me how that started), and somehow, I managed to say something that made the situation more awkward than it already was. when I realized this, I said, "that didn't come out right"... that just made things more awkward.

I feel like there's a flaw in the way the Barrett Dining hall is run. There are no trays and they give you tiny portions. because the portions are so small, I always want more food, but since there's no trays, I burn off all the calories from the little portions on my way to get seconds. As a result, I usually get hungry an hour or two after I eat.

Actually, I'm hungry right now.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

top 5 SNICKERS commercials

I would like to start by saying that I have no affiliation to Snickers candy bars or the Mars company as a whole. I'm only writing this because I'm a fan of chocolaty goodness and funny
commercials. Basically, I just wanted to show everybody my five favorite Snickers advertisements... so here they are


For number 5, I'm taking it back to 1997. this commercial is really simple, but I really think it gets the point across well. Everybody's been in a situation like this where they just screwed up something major and now have to fix it. It's times like this when we look to crunchy peanuts and caramel for comfort. Thanks, Snickers... you were there when I needed you.


Everything about this commercial is great. Every line is quotable, and it always makes me laugh. Also, it's got Patrick freaking Ewing in it... what's cooler than that? (actually, a lot of things... Dennis Rodman, Shawn Kemp, David Robinson, Vince Carter, Charles Barkley, Kobe, etc...). Seriously, even though "The Beast of the East" has put on a little weight since his NBA days, it's still great to see him back on the court.


I remember watching this commercial in between halves of a Colts victory over the Chicago Bears (Devin Hester's kickoff return was nice though too). I know that there was a lot of controversy over whether the ad was inappropriate or homophobic or whatever, but I thought it was excellent and definitely deserving of a spot on my list.


First, you've gotta love Mr. T (I pity the fool who isn't a Mr. T fan) and I like most things that have to do with tanks, yelling or destruction so this is pretty much a given for me. When you add the fact that the soccer player gets called out for "acting like a crazy fool" and the comparison of the peanuts in a Snickers bar to ... well... you know... it makes for one epic commercial.


There's so much awesomeness in this commercial... the catchy song, the guitar that's randomly behind the chair, the weird way the guys look at each other, the fact that the guy is alone at a random desk amidst huge rolls of fabric, the way the guy whispers, "the world" at the end... this is one of my all time favorite commercials. I wish that guy would come and help me enjoy the next Snickers I eat (eww... not in a weird way... I want it to be like the commercial. Get your mind out of the gutter)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Song of the moment: "I Will Always Love You" -Whitney Houston

I'm pretty sure Dolly Parton did this song first, but this will always be the definitive version for me. It is also what I think about when I think of Whitney Houston. I know that, recently, she's been more famous for her marital issues and alleged drug abuse, but Whitney has made some pretty good songs throughout the years, and this is definitely one of them.

Thing that I am currently anticipating: My laundry being finished. I had no clean undershirts today... so I had to wash some.

Doodle/image of the day:

Captain Short Shorts is basically one of the most awesome super heroes ever

Random Thoughts: Today I'm wearing shorts for the first time in at least a month (not including running shorts)... but I'll probably change when my laundry is done. I guess i don't really like having my knees exposed.

I really want a denim vest... like a jacket with the sleeves cut off. I know it might make me look like a loser, but I don't really care. All I have to do now is find a cheap jacket that fits well... and isn't ugly.

Do they have lots of sales on Veterans Day? I haven't been watching enough television to see all of the commercials for stuff.

Why did I go run at 6:30 this morning? I could have run at 8:00 and it would have been just as cool out. I'm kind of tired now.

Is it strange that I wear my jacket more often when I'm inside than I do when I'm outside? The air conditioning here is super legit... too legit... to quit.

My room is dirty again already... dangit!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Eric = Anakin

Warning: this will only make sense if you are familiar with the current season of Gossip Girl and Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

Alright... so I was watching Gossip Girl last night and Eric made a comment about how Jenny is turning into Darth Vader because she is now a power-hungry, tyrant with no regard for her former friends and family. This immediately caught my attention because I am a pretty big Star Wars fan (I'm not one of those obsessive people, but I've seen all of the original movies several times, and I've seen most of the prequels at least twice). However, at the end of the episode, Eric's boyfriend realizes that, in an effort to save Jenny from her destructive path, Eric has reduced himself to her level of backstabbing and petty conniving. Realizing that Eric has undergone a fundamental change in his nature, Eric's boyfriend proceed to dump him... but that's beside the point.

If you think about Revenge of the Sith, Anakin changes in a similar way. Whereas he is initially optimistic and enthusiastic about the Jedi teachings of honor, respect and the rejection of anger, he begins to change when he realizes that these methods don't always yield the intended results. In Revenge of the Sith, Anakin has a vision that his wife will die in childbirth (He's not even supposed to have a wife... Jedi are too busy defending the galaxy and stuff to have time for serious relationships). After realizing that he cannot prevent this occurrence through traditional Jedi means, he turns to Senator Palpatine (A.K.A. the Darth Sidious) for help.

Sooo... what's the connection? Like Anakin, Eric is frustrated with his lack of results when he tries to save Jenny by conventional means. Because of this, he uses lies and the help of Blair (A.K.A. the Queen Bee of Manhattan... even though she's not as pretty as Serena) to supplant the former hierarchy with a new one where Jenny is not the ruler. Also, I think Eric looks a little bit like Anakin... no?

In conclusion, Eric is pretty much like Anakin Skywalker circa Episode III (probably like halfway through the movie... not at the end where he gets his legs chopped off). Hopefully, Eric will be able to see the error in his ways before it's too late... but if not, the trust fund teens and socialites better lock their doors at night because there's a new Sith Lord roaming the Upper East Side!

change while you still can, Eric
Song of the moment: "El Farol" -Santana

There's not that much to say about this... it's a good song by Santana

Thing that I am currently anticipating: Tomorrow... no school, video games, movies and lots of homework for all of my classes. What could be better than that?

Doodle/image of the day:

Sorry about my crappy camera skills, but you get the idea... right?

Random thoughts:
Sometimes, after I eat something, I can taste it hours later when I burp. Today at lunch, I had some Italian sausage and pasta... now, I can sort of taste it in my mouth even though I had lunch three hours ago. Is it weird that I kind of enjoy it when that happens? It's like my stomach's way of saying, "remember lunch... that was good. I would give you a high five if I had hands"

On Sunday, I ran in the Phoenix 5k and 10k. I decided to do the 5k race because I wanted to run fast. I didn't do as well as I would have liked, but I'm still happy I did the race. However, on my complementary t-shirt, it only says "Phoenix 10k". What's up with that? is the 5k cool enough to warrant a mention on official race apparel. I feel so neglected :'(

At the race, they gave out free bananas so I took a bushel (I don't think it's called a "bushe"l... is it called a "bunch"? "bunch" sounds funny). I like bananas, but not that much. What am I going to do with all these bananas?

I like eating, but I'm not so keen on cooking... and I hate cleaning... that's why I order pizza!

I wonder if it hurt when Tupac got "Thug Life" tattooed on his stomach... I've never gotten a tattoo, but I could imagine it being pretty painful. I wonder if he cried. I wouldn't cry... but that's because I would never get "Thug Life" tattooed on my stomach.

I have no idea why a big chunk of text is underlined... it just happened and I don't know how to fix it.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Berlin Wall

Today marks the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall (or that's what I thought... I know it fell in 1989, but I had no Idea of the specific date... I just saw some stuff on the internet about it this morning that looked pretty legit so I decided to run with it) In honor of this important anniversary, I thought it would be nice to take a look at some other walls and wall-related stuff.

The Great Wall of China

You have to admit that this is a pretty epic wall. It was built between the 5th and 16th centuries to keep out invading dudes. Also, it's over 8,000k long and you can see it from space!

The "Green Monster"

I'm not a big Red Sox fan (Yankees = World Series champs... take that!), but the "Green Monster" at Fenway park is notorious for crushing hopes of many would-be home run hits.

"The Wall"

How could I talk about walls without mentioning Pink Floyd's classic rock opera about an isolated dude who builds a wall? If you ask me, that's pretty wall-related. Anyway, it's a great album and a confusing movie (I haven't seen the whole movie, but I can't immagine it making that much sense to me even if I had)

The wall that Humpty Dumpty fell off

The tragedy of Humpty Dumpty is a well known part of everyone's childhood. If it wasn't for the wall, poor Humpty might still still be with us today (probably not though... he would have hatched or rotted by now).

When I think about it, why did they need the king's horses to help fix Humpty? I could understand why all the king's men would be needed (actually, I can't. why did the king even care about humpty... he's just an egg), but horses obviously don't have the fine motor skills needed to fix an egg... they don't even have opposoble thumbs!

"Stonewall" Jackson

In case you didn't know, "Stonewall" Jackson was one of the most famous and skilled military Commanders in American history. Even though the Confederate army was eventually pwned by the Union forces, "Stonewall" gave Abraham Lincoln and his buddies plenty of grief until he died of pneumonia.

Hadrian's Wall

I have to admit that I totally forgot what this was until someone reminded me today (thanks, Spencer), but Hadrian's Wall was commissioned by the Roman emperor Hadrian around 122 to defend the Roman Empire in what is now northern England. It was around 117k long, and it was made of rocks and stuff... that sounds pretty cool to me.

The Fourth Wall

the Fourth Wall is probably my favorite wall. It's that thing that separates the actions and events that occur on stage or screen from the real world that the audience lives in. It's kind of hard to display an imaginary wall in a picture... so I put a funny web comic up where the Fourth Wall is broken instead.


Last but certainly not least, there's Wall-E, the lovable robot from the movie. I haven't actually seen Wall-E (I know... shame on me... if anyone has a copy, can I borrow it?) so that's all I really have to say about him.
Song of the moment: "In The Light" -Led Zeppelin

Actually, I'm not currently listening to this song (I'm waiting for my class to start), but it was stuck in my head on the way over here. Anyway, it's a pretty good song. Basically, it's eight minutes of awesomeness.

Thing that I am currently anticipating: "Gossip Girl". You can say what you want, but that show is oddly addictive, and the thought of watching it tonight makes Mondays more bearable.

This (along with my lack of facial hair) probably doesn't help my case for keeping my "man card", but I can build really good fires and I eat a lot of bacon... take that!!

Doodle/image of the day:

I must confess that this picture is a few months old, but it got no love on Facebook :( I thought that my anonymous blog readers might appreciate it more.

Random Thoughts: I really enjoy short stories. I like them because they're easy to read, and they have interesting/confusing endings... short stories pwn!

I think I might have poor circulation in my toes or something. it's like 75 degrees in here and my toes feel like ice cubes... and I don't mean the "Straight Outta Compton" ice cube... actual ice cubes made of frozen water.

I have two leather shoe laces and I don't know what to do with them. they're too long to make a bracelet, too short to make a belt and a necklace is kind of weird... and all of my shoes already have laces.

I really want to change into something more comfortable, but I'm already wearing comfortable clothes. I think that I'm just used to the ritual of changing my clothes after school. However, when I'm already wearing normal clothes to school, how much more normal can I get after class? Does that make any sense?

I'm sooo hungry... but if I eat now, I won't be as hungry for dinner in half an hour. Life is hard.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

No Shave November... and facial hair in general

Although November often brings about thoughts of Thanksgiving, Veterans day, football, fall leaves and the high school cross country state championship meet (maybe I'm the only one who thinks about that last one), the eleventh month of the year should also conjure thoughts of No Shave November. That's right... the month-long celebration of all things hairy. If you're not familiar with No Shave November, the name pretty much sums it up. For the month of November, you decide not to grow out a particular hairy area of your body that would otherwise regularly shave. While NSN is usually associated with guys and facial hair, it's open for all genders and areas of the body (personally, I think it's a little gross to think about women growing out their leg hairs and stuff, but it's a free country and they have as much right to grow their hair as anyone else).

Alright... cool. Now that that's settled, here's the second, more awkward portion of this post. Basically, I think an awesome beard and/or mustache is one of the most badass things you can put on your face (that's a pretty stupid statement... what else can you put on your face besides facial hair? Glasses, tattoos, piercings... that's about it). Facial hair is like a cool spoiler or body kit on a car... it takes something ordinary and makes it really awesome. Also, if worn correctly, facial hair can raise a dude's (or woman... I guess. There's no need to be sexist) level of manliness exponentially. Think about it... would Gandalf be as awesome as he is if he didn't have his sick beard? (or conversely, would Legolas be as lame as he is if did have a beard?) Would people allow Santa Clause to break into their houses and eat cookies if he was naked-faced? NO! The facial hair factor is clearly very important in many situations. Furthermore, a hairy face is a sure-shot way to attract the ladies. Why do you think all of those 1970's porn star guys had mustaches? (actually, that's kind of gross... I've never heard of someone being complemented on their porn-stache... you should probably just forget that I ever brought up porn stars and facial hair in the first place... ewwwww). Even if the particular woman you are trying to woo is initially unsuportive of your wiskers, I can gaurantee that she'll come around in time (I can't actually gaurantee that)... women are naturally attracted to awesome beards.

Now for the sad part of the post... after spending the last half hour typing about the positive attributes of facial hair and NSN, I must inform you that, as far as I know, I am physically incapable of growing an awesome beard and/or mustache. Despite my best efforts, I have never been able to grow anything more than dirt-stache, a cluster of hairs on my chin and a few scraggly outliers on my neck. What's the deal here? Did I not eat enough hormone-infused fast food as a child? Do I need to chop down a tree or start a bar fight in order to upgrade my man card to platinum status? Was I chosen by God to maintain a baby face for the rest of my life? (actually, if that's the case, I shouldn't complain too much. that's way better than some of the stuff he told Abraham to do). Oh well... I guess there's nothing I can do about it. I'm still participating in NSN regardless of whether or not I actually have any hair to abstain from shaving.

Oh yeah... here's some cool beard pics:


You may have noticed that I haven't really posted anything over the last week. My Bad... I got so caught up in other things that I forgot to post here. I know... shame on me for putting things like homework, sleep, my social life and being lazy ahead of blogging on the interwebz. However, that's all going to change (maybe). From now on, I'll try to fulfill my responsibilities to my many readers (who am I kidding? I'm pretty sure I'm the only person who actually subscribes to this blog) by regularly posting meaningless information about my life. In order to make up for my recent absence, I will now post a number of short, random updates... Yeah!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Paranormal Inactivity

Before I say anything else, let my start by start by explaining that I am not a fan of horror movies. For some reason, it's difficult for me to suspend my disbelief and buy into the idea that there are ghosties or goblins or possessed toys are haunting people and messing up their lives. Even so, I went into go see Paranormal Activity last night, expecting to pretty scared. from what I'd heard from other people, the movie was supposed to give me nightmares or make me crap my pants in fright or something like that. However, once I actually saw the movie, I was extremely underwhelmed. how can this be the scariest movie in years when nothing happens!?! I know the plot was supposed to build slowly and be realistic, but the most exciting thing in the first 45 minutes was a creaky door. A CREAKY DOOR!! Maybe poor house maintenance could be scary if you're Bob Vila or Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, but normal people suck it up and go back to sleep.

Even when the action did pick up, it was very limited, and it was surrounded by long periods of boring jokes and crappy camera work. Basically, the movie was like an episode of "America's Boringest Home Videos" or some excessively long, low budget episode of "MTV Cribs". I'm pretty sure all the action could be compiled into one ten minute Youtube clip... and it would still be boring. That's because every time the "demon" visits the couple, the same thing happens. Let me summarize it for you...

The couple hears loud footsteps
Guy: "wtf was that!"
Girl: "Aaaaah"
The door creaks
Guy: "bring it on, demon!"
Girk: "honey, don't provoke it"
Guy: "my bad"
The couple cuddles together in fear
The camera cuts off

If it wasn't for the fact that I kind of had to go to the bathroom throughout the whole movie (and it was supposed to be one of the best movies of the year), I probably would have gone to sleep after the first twenty minutes. Maybe in real life, demons are extremely boring characters, but if you want me to pay $7 to watch them haunt people, I think they should spice up their act. Seriously... I think I watched a video about noble gases in High School Chemistry class that kept me more entertained than this.

Ultimately, if you like watching people do normal things in front of a video camera, interspersed with random disturbances by a the lamest movie monster ever (more lame than the alien in Signs), Paranormal Activity is probably the film for you. However, if you'd prefer that something actually happens during the 90 minutes that you're staring at the screen, I'd suggest an actual movie with actual actors, actual camera work and an actual plot.

p.s. If you can think of anything that would change my opinion about Paranormal Activity or Horror movies in general, feel free to comment.